Off to a Good Start!

 February 3, 2022

Several years ago, my sister got me a Fitbit for Christmas.  Once I got it and made 10,000 steps a day my goal, I was pretty faithful for a good long time.  It might have even been as many as two years where it was incredibly rare that I didn't hit my goal and if I didn't, it wasn't too far off the mark.  I walked late at night, in the rain or in the heat of summer.  I walked by myself or with my daughter or with my then-husband.  I walked when I was tired and I walked when I was sick.  Walk I did, though.  Every day.  But then I hit a rough patch--an understandable one.  After a diagnosis of cancer and the five surgeries that ensued, recovery took me off my schedule and out of my routine.  In between surgeries I'd heal and get back up to speed with my walking, but then I'd be out again for a time when I went in for the next surgery. I got out of the habit and the mindset of making that a priority.  And then I made excuses.  I was happy when I hit 10,000, but not too sad if my count was 7,000.  It was close enough.  At least it wasn't 2,000, right?  There were days when I didn't even wear my Fitbit, but there were even more days when I wore it but never once looked at it.  I knew I wasn't getting in all the steps, and I didn't want the rebuke from my device reminding me of that.

We all have the same amount of time in our day, and how we spend that time shows what we prioritize.  This year on January 1, I decided to do a reset and send that goal all the way back up near the top of my list.  Not the top, mind you--friends, family, work, reading, and writing (thus the much more frequent blog entries this year than in the past few!)--are all some of the priorities that round out my most important, but walking gets to be in the mix too.  In the past few years it was on the list, but it was a long, long way down.  Like, I knew in my head it was on the list, but it was on page fourteen, you know?  The 'priorities' you know you should have, so you write them down, but you never quite get to?  So far this year, however, my should have goal has just become my goal, and I am happy to report that the first month of the year I managed to meet it every day--even when it was cold out and I was tired and I didn't really want to do it.  The routine is becoming a habit once again.

Walking at Night in the Neighborhood

 January 20, 2022

I went for my nightly walk tonight to get the rest of my 10,000 steps for the day.  As I was on the return jaunt, I had to cross a neighborhood park to make it to my street. On the far side of the park, there was a little red car parked, engine idling, lights off.  I'd have to cross right by it to make my way to toward my house. Bear in mind that I walk generally between the 10 and 11 p.m. hour.  It's dark, and many household have settled in for the night. The vehicle was directly in my path, and it occurred to me that I am incredibly annoyed that even in the year 2022, the things that ran through my mind were, "What if that's someone lying in wait to abduct an unsuspecting passer-by?  How far around the car do I need to walk in order to give myself a shot if I need to break into a run? Are the houses near enough that if I screamed, someone would hear? If someone hopped out of the car, could I get a scream out before someone's hand reached out to cover my mouth? What can I do if there is more than one person in the car?" I was not afraid, but this this a normal thought process for women out walking, taking up space in the world. I have to be aware; I have to always be wary. Why is this still the norm?

Walking in the Fog

 January 13, 2022

When the new year began, I renewed my committment to myself to hold myself accountable to my Fitbit goal again.  10,000 steps, every day.  Because I'm a night owl, I prefer to do my walking at night, and because it's January, several nights I've been out walking have been pretty foggy.  I've always really enjoyed walking in the fog.  As cheesy as it sounds, fog was always slightly reminiscent of a hug to me, enveloping me close and tucking in around me. There is something peacefully solitary and reflective about the mists surrounding you and blanketing the world around you in a cotton candy haze. I remember being a kid on the playground at school when it was densely foggy out and thinking everything is fuzzy and magical right here in front of me, but two feet out I have no idea what lies beyond.  Out there, it didn't feel frightening or threatening--just unknown, and full of possibility.  It's like that in life too, really.  We know our lives and we see the lives we're living and the immediate path we're on, but we really just don't know as we move through the fog what we're going run into that we just can't see right now.  There are people and opportunities and experiences out there that we have no idea are out there yet, but there they are, just ahead, just out of sight, just beyond the magical haze.  The closer we get, they come into view and become part the space we inhabit.  Just keep walking.

Walking Late at Night

January 8, 2018

I am the owner of a Fitbit--I have been a fairly active walker for the past three years.  I know at my age and in my shape, walking 4-5 miles a day is a good, consistent part of a routine to keep myself in decent physical health.  That being said, I am a night owl, especially during vacation.  Left to my own devices, I'll sleep in until anywhere between 8 and 10, but stay up until 2 a.m. or so.  So I like to walk at night.  Typically I walk around 11 at night.  Being a woman living in these times, I try to be as careful as possible--I choose paths where street lights are in good repair, I scan parked cars to be sure there aren't people quietly waiting there for unsuspecting passersby, and I avoid large bushes or obstructions behind which someone might be lurking, and certainly do not walk on my own around the perimeter of the neighborhood park after hours.  I travel with my phone and and air horn or alarm to alert others in case of danger.  I don't love that I have to take all these precautions, but I know that if I choose to walk at night.  These are likely not precautions that most men even have to think about, but I know I don't have the luxury of being oblivious to potential dangers.  As I am walking, then, late at night, hyper-aware of shadows and the ever-present possibility of threat, let me assure you, random single man slowing your dark vehicle to a crawl behind me--your 'good intent' to shout helpful safety advice did not make me feel safer or appreciative.  Drive on!

Hittin' The Road

February 28, 2014

I finally felt up to taking myself and my FitBit out for a walk tonight (after being out of commission due to a very painful dental emergency for three days)---and promptly fell flat on my face. I mean, literally. I stepped weirdly on a rock on the sidewalk, lost my balance and suddenly pitched forward. In order to avoid landing on my surgically 'enhanced' knee, I landed instead totally flat-out on my face and hands--like I had suddenly decided to do push-ups on the sidewalk at 11:00 at night. Three days without taking my FitBit out and about, and suddenly it's like I've completely forgotten how to walk. On the bright side, my cartoon pratfall offered a little humor break to my hubby (before he so kindly checked to see if I was okay and then helped me up).